I know that the emails have been coming frequently and often over the last few days and I know that the ways in which you have been encouraged to help are many. This can lead a person to feel overwhelmed and possibly even paralyzed, because they don’t know how to respond.
With that in mind, I’d like to just offer a few quick suggestions as well as an invitation.
First, as you this notice by The Wesleyan Church states, all churches have been asked to hold a day of prayer and fasting. I’d like to ask you to join with me and the members of the Mt. Union Wesleyan Church in fasting and praying for the country of Haiti, its people, and those who are providing aid and assistance on Monday, January 18th. The concept is simple- if you do not have any medical conditions that would keep you from fasting, take Monday off from eating and instead spend the time that you would otherwise spend eating in prayer. If you cannot skip every meal, skip one or two.
Second, on Monday evening, January 18th, I would like to invite you, your friends, and your family for a prayer vigil which will be held here at the Mt. Union Wesleyan Church. The vigil will start at 6pm and will include a time of singing followed by a focused time of prayer for the people of Haiti, for the missionaries and relief workers who are administering assistance, and for the government as they try to determine what to do in the days that are to come.
Third, on Sunday morning and at the prayer service we will be taking up a special offering. The offering will go in its entirety to the relief work in Haiti. As the board of general superintendents has requested, we are encouraging each person to prayerfully consider giving what would amount to one day’s wages in addition to one’s regular tithes and offerings. God has graciously blessed us, may we now be a blessing to those who are truly in need of blessing and encouragement!
Fourth, you and your family can put together a “health kit” which we will collect and will subsequently pass along to UMCOR for distribution in Haiti. Each kit is to consist of:
1 hand towel (15” x 25” up to 17” x 27”)
1 wash cloth
1 comb (large and sturdy, not pocket-sized)
1 nail file or fingernail clippers (no emery boards or toenail clippers)
1 bath-size bar of soap (3 oz and up)
1 toothbrush (single brush only in original wrapper; no child-sized brushes)
1 large tube of toothpaste (4.5 or larger, expiration date must be 6 months or longer in advance of the date of shipment)
6 adhesive plastic strip sterile bandagesThese items or a completed kit can be brought to church in the days and weeks ahead.
I predict that the use of social media in a marriage relationship will become one of the biggest issues I will be dealing with in marriage counseling in the future.
So writes pastor and counselor Rhett Smith in a recent blog post. (You can read the post in its entirety here.) My initial inclination was to rather snarkily retort that he was beginning to sound like those who run around warning that sky is falling every time that it rains.
Thankfully, I resisted these initial urges to respond and rashly spout off my gut reactions. I say thankfully because tonight, as I ate with my wife and son, I overheard a couple (not-yet married) who were debating proper etiquette regarding cell calls, text messages, and tweets during a date. The young man took a rather hardline and decried cellphones and all accompanying uses off limits during dinner, although the proper etiquette while at the store or in the moments before a movie were still up for debate. The young woman, however, felt that while it was rude to talk on the phone during dinner that it was perfectly acceptable to send and receive text messages, as long as it was done discreetly.
As someone who totes an iPhone, I have to admit that I was intrigued by the conversation. When I first got my phone it rested on the nightstand. If the phone rang, I answered it. If it pulsated, revealing a text or incoming tweet- I would venture a look to see what short, pithy message had come my way.
Crystal, thankfully, quickly addressed the issue for what it was- unhealthy.
If my cellphone makes its way into our bedroom it does so only if it needs charging, if we know someone to be near death, or if I am expecting a call which I have previously talked with Crystal regarding.
Texting and Twittering while in a car, out to dinner, or whilst engaged in conversation are something that I have also been guilty of. Usually I am wise enough to wait until the person that I am with likewise receives a call, decides to respond to a text, etc. However, Rhett has got me wondering whether such behavior is healthy.
For example, if I am out with Crystal and Quinton is it okay and healthy for me to check my email and send a quick Tweet if Crystal is on the phone with her mother?
Is it okay, if we are trying to make a decision regarding a possible purchase to send a quick Tweet or text message asking for help and/or advice from someone who may have made a similar purchase?
Or, what if I am in the middle of a conversation with someone other than my spouse or child- is this a violation of our relationship and our relational boundaries?
To add fuel to the fire and to the conversation, I would simply add something else that Rhett says. He writes,
I think one of the greatest gifts we can give someone is our full-attention–full-presence. We may not always be able to be physically present with people, so we do our best to be with them in the best way possible (phone, Facebook, Twitter, Skype, blog, etc.).
But if we are face to face with someone (in a wedding, church service, meeting, etc.), then what greater thing can we do for them?
So, what do you think?
What are the appropriate and healthy bounds for social media (Twitter, Facebook, etc.)?
Are the boundaries different when it comes to your spouse and your family, then with others?
I came across this article, this morning, as I sat down to my computer.
Immediately, the headline grabbed my attention. Boundaries have been pushed as ‘Reality TV’ has endeavored to make everything from the most mundane aspects of human existence, to some of the most private and familial aspects, available to every prying eye.
I’m not surprised, nor am I shocked that we would reach the point where we would record and watch someone die an agonizing death. Such TV was inevitable. If the public demands it, someone will meet that demand.
After all, you can now watch surgeries, in their entirety, as they stream online. We can watch, on television, as a woman gives birth to her children. Videos of sexual acts flicker across television screens and computer monitors at an incredible rate. What were private (or familial) moments have now become public domain.
Should a person’s death be different? Why or why not?
What are the benefits of turning the various aspects of our life into ‘Reality TV’ bites to be streamed and viewed?
What are the dangers associated with turning the private and familial moments of our lives into videos and images that are available to be bought, sold, and viewed by the public?
President Barack Obama, whose gay and lesbian supporters have grown frustrated with his slow movement on their priorities, is extending benefits to same-sex partners of federal employees, a White House official said.
Obama planned to announce his decision Wednesday in the Oval Office, the official said. The official spoke on the condition of anonymity because Obama had not signed a presidential memorandum putting his plan into place.
The above quote comes from an AP article, “Same-sex partners to get fed benefits,” written by Philip Elliot. The headline and announcement, which is slated to be made later today, will undoubtedly get the attention of conservative Christians. In fact, there will be a number of blog posts, comments, telephone calls, etc. written in order to expression opposition regarding this decision.
In making the statements that I am about to make, I feel that I need to preface what I am about to say. First and foremost, I am a follower of Jesus. I believe that if we claim to follow Christ that we are to love the Lord our God with every fiber of our being and the we are to love others as we love ourselves. Secondly, I believe that Scripture is the inspired Word of God which was faithfully recorded, by the biblical writers, over a significant period of time. These biblical writers were not mere writing utensils in the hands of God. Nor were they individuals who wrote devoid of a cultural and sociological backdrop. In fact, in many instances, as they recorded the Word of God, they addressed specific issues that were pertinent at that point and time in history.
With these two things in mind, I would like to offer up my thoughts regarding what is sure to be a controversial announcement later this afternoon.
Issues of sexuality and sexual orientation are “hot topics,” which cause a great deal of divide. Some argue that one’s sexual orientation is a choice. I, for example, have made the decision to be heterosexual; while, some of my gay and lesbian friends, have made the decision to be homosexual. This choice, it is argued, may be precipitated by childhood experiences, abuse, or the desire to probe what has long been considered “taboo.” Others have suggested that homosexuality is something that one is genetically disposed towards. The argument, therefore, is that nature, and not nurture, has determined one’s sexual disposition. Admittedly, this is an insufficient and rather truncated explanation of what is a much more nuanced and complex argument; however, it will have to suffice given my current time constraints.
My own belief is that it does not really matter whether one is born with a disposition toward homosexuality or whether one makes a decision to become homosexual. I also believe that Scripture speaks against homosexual practice. In saying this, I know that I will offend many people. Some will label me as intolerant and stuck in the past. However, I would simply ask that you hear me out.
Scripture, as best as I understand it, decries homosexual practice. Albeit, it may well be that Scripture addresses a cultural phenomena in which an older male, by way of a mentoring relationship, would essentially abuse the young boy, which he was mentoring. Yet, even if one makes that argument (and there are some who have done so rather convincingly), I still find nothing in the biblical text that speaks of the homosexual lifestyle in a positive light. Time and again, the biblical text speaks of God’s design for human relationships, and when it speaks of God’s design for sexual expression it is within the context of a relationship between a man and a woman.
In saying this, however, I want to be clear that I believe homosexual practice to be incongruous with the Christian life in the same way that sexual promiscuity, viewing of pornographic materials, lying, cheating, and hate are incongruous with the Christian life.
With the knowledge that I have failed to adequately convey the many things that are swirling around in my mind, and with a willingness to dialogue with others who are versed in the subjects of Scripture and human sexuality, I now turn to the topic at hand- the decision to give benefits to same-sex partners. It is a decision that some will applaud and cheer, while it will cause others to shake their head and gasp in horror.
My own thoughts go something like this:
First, I wrestle with why it is more objectionable to extend benefits to same-sex partners than to those couples which live together outside of the covenant of marriage or are remarried (having been divorced for any reason other than those listed in Scripture). According to Scripture, such lifestyles are just as much displeasing to God as the lifestyle characterized by homosexual practice. Why, therefore, are Christians more upset by this announcement than by previous decisions to broaden the scope of benefits to include those whose lifestyles also fall outside of the biblical parameters regarding relationships?
Second, why will this announcement receive more attention from evangelical Christians, myself included, than the fact that there are thousands who will die, today, in America due to sub-standard or no health-care? Why will we spend more time decrying “the decline of the moral fiber of America” then we will actively pursuing justice and mercy, as we walk humbly with our God?
Third, why are we so much more ready to identify the sinfulness of homosexuality than we are the sins that we might be engaging in? Why are we so ready to point out the sinfulness of homosexual practice, while we harbor a lustful thought? Why are we so ready to rail against this decision by the government, while we are so content to sit idly by and allow the government to perpetuate unfair labor laws which are unjust, unfair, and equally displeasing to God?
Fourth, I wrestle with how we stand up for what we believe in, while at the same time being both loving and graceful in our relationships with others.
In conclusion, I would like to express my thanks to those who have taken the time to read my fumbled, and at times incoherent, ramblings. I am not an authority on the subject. The thoughts that I have expressed are solely my own. They are my attempt to look at life, in light of Scripture. Admittedly, I, at this moment, see things but dimly. I look forward to that day when clarity and perfection will come. Until that day arrives, however, I open to hearing your thoughts, suggestions, and criticisms in the context of an ongoing dialogue that is characterized by both kindness and graciousness.
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